Terms and Conditions

We, the Minimalist Service, are a highly-advanced, hyper-sophisticated, and completely-not-over-the-top service provider. By using our service, you agree to the following:

1. Not to use our service unless you're wearing a fedora and a three-piece suit.
2. To never, ever, use our service while consuming more than 300 calories in a single sitting.
3. To always, always, always use our service while standing on one foot and reciting the entirety of "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu.

By continuing to use our service, you acknowledge that you're ready to sacrifice your social life, your sanity, and your ability to form meaningful relationships in exchange for the most efficient, most streamlined, most utterly-barebones user experience known to humanity.

Acceptance Form | Frequently Asked Questions